Have you ever had one of those dreams?
I have these vivid dreams that scare me. Not nightmares, they're dreams like one of those artsy-indie movies that slowly eats your soul or makes you want to die of sadness. Yes, they get that bad. I see entire movies in my dreams...and I mean entire. I know that because I can actually scroll through and see the little screenshots of the entire movie while I'm seeing the story unfold , kinda like on some YouTube videos. I don't know why I keep seeing them, maybe its because I've been watching a lot of shows and movies lately.
Last night I had one of those dreams and like all of them, they usually start out benign and then quickly build up to the terror that scares me and I have to 'scroll foward' to escape the bad parts or just wake up. What truly scares me though is the stories, they are the kind I've never heard of with beautiful dialogues and everything but the events within the dream are often raw and harsh and disturbing. After the initial scare of content, I get further terrified when I realize that my mind probably created this...this terrible, terrible idea.
I wonder if it reflects the state of my mind? I feel almost ashamed if it does, because though original and beautiful, they are also almost depraved of a sense of shame or guilt. Maybe that's why I dream them, because I felt that way when I went to sleep. They say dreams reflect your state of mind don't they? I figure, if they're in your head, they must be coming from somewhere in there too, plus I'm not too sure of the the details on if God designs my dreams, but if He does, He should totally have closed captioning explaining the meaning of what's going on in said dream so I don't freak out that my mind could imagine such things. Just saying, it would be very helpful and calming. Like chamomile tea for dreams, I mean as therapy for dreams, not so you can go to sleep and have them. Ugh, I'm getting distracted.
I am often a part of these dreams too, usually in relation to the main character, like a sister etc. I don't remember ever being a main character in these particular set of dreams I have, which is interesting to me.
Anyway, I just wanted to write this moment down to remember it later, because I'm not one of those people who remembers dreams, let alone can control myself in them. I didn't even know people could actually do that until I was in like, my 20's. I wonder if my inability to control my dreams means something too.
Anyway, do you have dreams like this? I would say comment with your worst/most shocking dream but please don't tell me if I could lose sleep over it. Think of my sleep, and my dreams. Show some kindness to my already scarred mind.
I just realized I've turned into one of those people who dissect their probably meaningless dreams for a significant amount of time...I need to stop.
Last night I had one of those dreams and like all of them, they usually start out benign and then quickly build up to the terror that scares me and I have to 'scroll foward' to escape the bad parts or just wake up. What truly scares me though is the stories, they are the kind I've never heard of with beautiful dialogues and everything but the events within the dream are often raw and harsh and disturbing. After the initial scare of content, I get further terrified when I realize that my mind probably created this...this terrible, terrible idea.
I wonder if it reflects the state of my mind? I feel almost ashamed if it does, because though original and beautiful, they are also almost depraved of a sense of shame or guilt. Maybe that's why I dream them, because I felt that way when I went to sleep. They say dreams reflect your state of mind don't they? I figure, if they're in your head, they must be coming from somewhere in there too, plus I'm not too sure of the the details on if God designs my dreams, but if He does, He should totally have closed captioning explaining the meaning of what's going on in said dream so I don't freak out that my mind could imagine such things. Just saying, it would be very helpful and calming. Like chamomile tea for dreams, I mean as therapy for dreams, not so you can go to sleep and have them. Ugh, I'm getting distracted.
I am often a part of these dreams too, usually in relation to the main character, like a sister etc. I don't remember ever being a main character in these particular set of dreams I have, which is interesting to me.
Anyway, I just wanted to write this moment down to remember it later, because I'm not one of those people who remembers dreams, let alone can control myself in them. I didn't even know people could actually do that until I was in like, my 20's. I wonder if my inability to control my dreams means something too.
Anyway, do you have dreams like this? I would say comment with your worst/most shocking dream but please don't tell me if I could lose sleep over it. Think of my sleep, and my dreams. Show some kindness to my already scarred mind.
I just realized I've turned into one of those people who dissect their probably meaningless dreams for a significant amount of time...I need to stop.
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